To: All The SINGLE Ladies

I began by thinking that I would do a very general New Years Toast like:
To love, honesty in love, and commitment in 2010.

However, I began to think that if you are a single woman this day in age with rising costs, an increasing unemployment rate, and one of the worst recessions we seen in over a decade…then we deserve a toast that’s specific to us.

This is to all the single ladies who have been:

Cast aside by the opposite sex;

Ignored by a gentleman of interest;

For single women experiencing emotional anguish and hearts filled with despair…
Right Now we are declaring this moment as ours.

To the women who are being kept in a man’s back pocket until HE is ready to settle down.

This is for those of you who are unknowingly and knowingly in a guy’s rotation of women;

For ladies who are single and in relationships and are seeking from your other half: “love, loyalty,honesty and trust, but most of all for friendship”.

This really is for Single women around the world who dream of that magic moment when he looks into your eyes, finds the lowest place above ground, and humbly initiates the beginning of “from this day forward”.

It is now Dec. 31, 2009 (11:59p central standard time) and I am raising my glass and saluting every SINGLE one of you.






To: Having faith and believing that there really is someone for everyone AND

To: Loving the single life in 2010 because right now… it is the only life that we have.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!

We Got Energy...Go Girl!!!

Hey Girls... we have our own Energy Drink...GO Girl!!!!!
(Click on the title of this post and it will take you to the website to locate your Go Girl Energy Drink)

Okay (Album Version) - Nivea f...

The Vampire : My Love

Writers can be so dramatic that it’s absolutely sickening, predictable, and quite frankly contrived.

So, I’m not going to talk about how he ripped my heart out of my chest. You wouldn’t believe me anyway if I said that he used my aorta as a straw to drink my blood. I won’t describe in detail the look of merriment on his face as he dug his fingers in my heart’s right and left atrium and tore it in half. He feasted on my bloody heart and was so turned on that as he attempted to swallow, the blood vessels got caught between his teeth, and he coughed up blood. MY blood. I don’t think you need to know that part.

The part that I didn’t tell anyone is that I had so much heart, that he couldn’t finish it all off. So, he held on to what was left of it.

But I will mention how I gave him a key chain that had “Dallas”, my city, on it. I hope you listen when I say that he warned me he could not keep it on his key ring because it was “too heavy”. It was a small forget me knot from ME. I guess he didn’t want to remember.

Spending time outside of the house and away from work at the movies, mall, or out to dinner was not a big priority because of our long work days and his money situation. Or at least that’s the impression he worked to give me.

The silence whenever I'm out of town. Not taking my calls and returning the call or text message days after I initiate contact. He lacks concern for me. There were a couple of times when I traveled for hours on the road alone, with not so much as a call to ask… “Did you make it safely”.

I should have stepped away from the situation completely when I visited his city over the summer.




We got so drunk that we ended up having amazing sex on the balcony and all over the hotel room.


The next morning he left early because he had to go to work and I awoke with a hang over you would not believe. So, I missed my flight. I texted him and I called him and he never responded until the following day when I left a very firm voice message on his machine.

Please don’t pass judgment because I am not sadistic. I do not in any way suffer from low self esteem. I was having a great time and I did not realize that my heart was exposed. This is why it has taken me this long to see that all of those situations that occurred were attacks on my heart.

It is only now, that I understand that before he snatched my heart from my body, he had already eroded pieces of it away.

It’s just that when he gives me this hypnotizing look, I feel so helpless. I go from being Cruise Control to a trapped mouse that’s fighting for her life. Desperately, trying not to show how weak I am.

And every time I tell myself it’s over, it’s one more time I am attempting to believe it. At this point, I am heartless. As you can see from above, he still has what’s left of my heart.

The Holiday PoP uPs

It’s the Holiday Season and one thing is for sure, it is the season for Ex-Boyfriends and Ex-Men of Interest to pop up like they just talked to you last week.

You know how sometimes you surf the internet to do research, check and send emails, waste time going to your favorite websites and you of course stop by this http://takeme2cruisecontrol.blogspot.com/ blog.

Then, out of no where, when you are in the middle of reading an article, an ad pops up in the middle of the screen and interrupts your flow. So, what do you do? Your two options are to search for the “X” to click on it to get rid of the ad or you have to somewhat read the ad to figure out how to make it disappear.




This is exactly how a number of single women feel about men who pop up around the holiday after we have NOT spoken to you in who knows how long. And yes ladies, it happens to all of us. For some reason men want to begin to show back up around Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Years when the weather gets cold. Look at how many babies are born around the end of spring and in the summer. I’m sure a large number of these babies are the result of a holiday Pop Up.



I really don’t understand why men think that around the holidays we want to hear from you after we have NOT heard from you in months. I mean if you are not dressed as Santa bearing gifts, then wait until the spring to say: “How You Doin?!!!“



Guys, if you decide to text or call around the holidays, then Ladies we need to treat them the same way we treat our computer screen pop ups. Do one of two things both having the same purpose. Either ignore or entertain.

If guys get the courage to call, we as women need to commit to pressing the IGNORE button and sending him to voicemail so he can leave a message. (Chances are he will not leave a message because he doesn’t want anything)



Or, be cordial and entertain the call… all while trying to figure out what to say to get him off the phone. Regardless of which option you choose, the goal is to: Make him disappear because if he were worth the time, he would have been around all along…Again, Guys, get a clue!!!

Writer's Laryngitis

When I created this blog, I wanted a space for women to share insight and express frustration with men.




For me, this blog also represented a platform to share what I was thinking no matter how inappropriate my thoughts may be perceived. This blog was suppose to be fun, interactive, and provoke conversation.

However, I quickly discovered how difficult it is to get people to participate in conversations. I also found that many other bloggers were working hard to increase traffic to their blogs. I expected to be able to write a post every other day and promote the blog with the hopes that I would increase my traffic. My expectations were high and unrealistic.

I did not share in the first posting titled, “Who is Cruise Control? Ms Jackson Said this Best In 1986” is: I am a writer. Not professionally, but perfectionally. (Perfectionally – I am a perfectionist when it comes to my writing)

What I mean by this is that I did not disclose how much I care about what I write. It matters to me how I get from the beginning paragraph to the last sentence. I kinda care if my reader doesn’t get the analogy I choose. This simple post may take me a couple of hours to write and by the end, I will have not understood what made me make the choices that I made to get to whatever my last sentence will be in this posting. And No, at this point, I do not know what the final sentence of this post will be. However, I will enjoy every 5 character footstep that it takes to get to the end of this post.

So, it’s been a very long time since I posted. August 2005 - a little over 4 years. Longer than what I ever intended when I created this spot.

For the past couple of months, I have thought very seriously about writing. For me, writing has always been about finding the dark corner in my mind and standing there no matter how long it takes. Listening to what’s being said and creatively explaining the experience by putting words on a page. (Note: I think I know the last sentence of the post.)

Four years, I have been waiting to come back to this spot. I never forgot it, but I couldn’t get here. Some may call it “writer’s block” which is when a writer looses the ability to produce new work. The cause can be attributed to a lack of creativity, stress, lack of inspiration, etc.



None of the above describes why I abandoned the blog for such a long time. When I stepped away from this space, I stepped away from writing as a whole. I have not recorded the conversations from my dark corner in four years.

My inability to write is what I refer to as Writer’s Laryngitis. I completely lost my voice! Over the four year period, I have had a lot to say, but somehow with the constant 14-hour days, traveling city-to-city, never seeming to relax enough to think, pressuring myself to create until I am satisfied… has been intimidating and exhausting. My voice left me. The more I searched for it, the more fearful I became of never finding it. So, I decided to call the search off and pray for it’s safe return.




There was an Anonymous post that was made on Sept. 25th of this year that said: “Two entries from you were just not enough. Very talented writer imho. How come you never posted anymore? Maybe you were just too busy playing the same old games with all the men in your life. No kidding..you should try this again.”

To: Anonymous (Whom ever you are), Thank you. This posting is for you. I hope you understand why I couldn’t get past the 2 entries. My thoughts plus your comment has forced me to begin the search again.

And to think…We just thought this spot was about how screwed up relationships are…

I'm Tired of Playing Games!..But you have to

It's so funny because I don't know that I have met a woman
that has not at some point said, "I'm tired of playing games".
I've even caught a few men uttering the same notion, "Ladies, No
games, PLEASE!". People...this is not realistic!!!

Let's first discuss this on a scientific level.

I want to take this back to Sir Issacc Newton's

laws of Gravity and Motion.

We all should come to expect times of ups

and downs in our relationships. There will

be moments of bliss and happiness. There will

be moments of anger and sadness. These are the

positive and negative forces that are always in motion.

As it pertains to Gravity: Newton's law says- what

goes up must come down. In other words, it's 2005

and your relationship is on the up &up, chances are in 2006,

he will PISS.. YOU... OFF. This is not necessarily bad, but it

should just be expected. This law also tells us that as

distance increases, gravity decreases. That means

that the farther mentally and emotionally you are

from your partner, your desire to play games decreases

because YOU... just... DON'T... care.

Newton's law of motion states - that every

ACTION has a REACTION. So if you FEEL your man

or woman is playing games, (whether it is true or not), then

you are more likely to play games as well.

You can't help how you FEEL. That's

not to say that playing games is right or wrong,

it's just your REACTION.

So, if your man looses his mind and acts

a damn fool with you,...then you need to

REACT in a BIG 'ole way. So that he won't

forget it. (Note: Not returning your

calls, not accepting your calls,

turning his cell phone off,

lying, trying to make you jealous,

are just a few examples of

your man, loosing his mind and

acting a damn fool) There needs to be a

REACTION.

You need to have a balance. Just like

in chess, you make a move, your

opponent makes a move. Unless

there is a power play where you are

allowed to make more than one move.

I do know that if you are always REACTING to

what he's doing, then you loose. Just like in sports,

if you are always on the defense, then you will never win.

It is okay to play games so long as it is not hurtful, but thought

provoking and progressive.

The minute we as women began to recognized

that we should expect the games, that's the

minute we can begin to play.

Please do not get caught off guard and think,

he is sooooo nice. He is not like the rest of

them who play games. Yes he is! He is

exactly like the rest of them.

And if you don't realize it, then YOU...

ARE...NOT...PAYING...ATTENTION!

I know some of you Ladies are probably wondering, Cruise Control, why do you care so much? If I choose not to play games with my man, then that is my choice.

News Flash!!!!! This is not your choice anymore. We as women need to stick together on this one.

I care because me and my friends are tired of dealing with these men who have lost their damn mind and they want to act a damn fool.

We are tired of cleaning up the bullshit that some of you didn't touch, saying the things that some of you should have said, and most importantly, putting him in the place he should have been in all along.

We have taken the high road for too long.

Fuck it!!! Let's just play.

Who is Cruise Control? Ms. Jackson Said this Best in 1986

"This is a story about control, my control. Control of what I say, control of what I do and this time I’m gonna do it my way. I hope you enjoy this as much as I do. Are we ready? I am? Cause it’s all about control. And I’ve got lots of it.

When I was 17, I did what people told me. Did what my father said, and let my mother mold me. But that was long ago. I’m in control, never gonna stop. Control, to get what I want. Control, I got to have a lot. Control, now I’m all grown up!

First time I fell in love I didn’t know what hit me. So young and so naive I thought it would be easy. But now I know I’ve got to take... Control. That’s right, I’m on my own, I’ll call my own shots, thank you. Got my own mind I wanna make my own decisions. When it has to do with my life, I wanna be the one in control.

So let me take you by the hand. And lead you on this dance. Cause what I’ve got is because I took a chance. I don’t wanna rule the world, just wanna run my life. So make your life a little easier when you get the chance just take...Control. Free at last, out here on my own. Now control this. That’s right, career moves I do what’s right for me and me wants to groove. Is that ok? Hop to it! I’m in control (and I love it, that’s right) Control, now I’ve got a lot. Control, now I’m all grown up. I’m in control, I’m in control! Don’t make me lose it." ...Lyrics

The dictionary defines Cruise Control as -

a relaxed and seemingly automatic pace that is easily maintained

This is who I am and how I am in the committed and not so committed romantic relationships that I have developed with members of the opposite sex. Now, this does not mean in any way that I am a controlling person. I'm really not on any level. However, I do practice self control. I am always in control of me and my actions. I don't let the men that I involve myself with control who I am or what I do. Ladies, if you just stick to being yourself and "play your game", then he can't "take you out of your game".

When it comes to your relationship,

remember: you control YOU.

Control - Janet Jackson